16 January 2008

Everybody’s a Weirdo

For a long time I’ve said, “Everybody’s a weirdo.” And it’s true. Every person in the world has habits that other people think are weird. That’s just how it goes.

I was tagged again, this time to write Seven Weird Facts About Me. It’s against my religion to tag others, but if you’re reading my blog – I’d love to know some weird facts about you!

Let the weirdness begin:

1. I love milk. But I can only drink 2% milk – with ice – and it MUST be in a glass-glass (as opposed to a plastic cup). If it sits for too long and I can see the ice melting, I won’t drink it. If I want to dunk, say an Oreo cookie, I require two separate glasses of milk – one with ice and the other without.

2. I love fart and poop jokes. If you know me and you were surprised by that statement, then you don’t really know me.

3. Fart facts are pretty interesting, too.

4. Worms freak me out. Snakes, lizards, frogs – they’re cool – but if you want to see me run away as fast as I can, whip out a worm and I’m gone.

5. Clowns on stilts with chainsaws also freak me out. I broke my own land-speed record when those guys showed up at the haunted house. My friends were only able to find me by following the drippy trail of diarrhea. (See, I told you I like poop jokes.)

6. I’m right-handed, but I use a left-handed mouse.

7. I have not puked since I was 8 years old.

Listening to: Modest Mouse - Dramamine


  1. We almost have #1 in common, sans ice. I also once sprained my ankle and nearly broke my leg running from (jumping off a huge embankment) a haunted house guy with a chainsaw. He wasn't even a clown or on stilts though I'm pretty sure I would've died right there if he were.

  2. I knew I was at the right site when I read "I love fart and poop jokes."

    As, you see, this is pretty much all I've got.

  3. @Dana, Last April, I tripped over some landscaping bricks that were NEXT to the sidewalk. I fell, skinned up both knees, both elbows, and the top and bottom of my left hand.

    The next day I found out that I also broke a bone in the top of my foot. (Fan-fucking-tastic.)

    For three weeks I was covered in bandages. I looked like I had been in a motorcycle wreck. "No ma'am, I tripped over something in the yard, fell and skid across the concrete sidewalk."

    The broken foot led to - a lifelong friend demoting me from bridesmaid to guestbook attendandant to her upcoming wedding (in July) because I might not have been able to wear the 5 inch heels required by her bridesmaids (better safe than sorry; wouldn't want the wedding guests to see one bridesmaid with different shoes! GASP!)

    Anyway, to make a long story short, the shoes were more important than the peson filling them. I received days of Bridezilla beratement (via voicemail and email) because I ruined her dream wedding.

    We haven't talked since.

    All because I'm a tad clumsy.

  4. Hmm I've never seen milk with ice. Why 2%?

    Can't blame you on #5. Well clowns are scary :D

  5. Styrafoam - the sound of two pieces rubbing together is absolutely awful - and the feel of unpolished styrafoam is horrible. Yuck yuck yuck.

  6. Mimi is right-handed, but uses her right-handed mouse with her left hand.

    She claims she's ambidextrous. She likes to illustrate her point now and then by writing with her left hand. In toddler script. What a show-off...

    Roufa is so right-handed, that he can't even watch TV if he's seated at the wrong side of the couch.

    Like great wealth, planning your "perfect wedding" allows you to be the person that you really are...

  7. Clowns in general scare me. One time I once heard that the scariest possible image is a clown on the side of the road at night. Scary!



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