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Jeannette does not eat sushi

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Little known fact: I have not puked since I was eight years old. That incident involved Pantera's Pizza and a ride home in the back of Ellen's dad's truck. It was like shaking up a bottle of soda just before twisting off the top, only instead of soda, I ejected half-digested pizza.

For about the next five or six years, from time-to-time I'd pretend I had puked so I could take a sick day from school. I stopped faking it once I realized that it was unusual for someone to go for years at a time without blowing chunks. I'm now 30 and have gone for 22 years without tossing my cookies, barfing, upchucking, hurling, liquid burping, or whatever you call it; I do not pray to the porcelain god.

The closest I've come to destroying my non-vomiting streak was the day before my 28th birthday. I had recently ended a fourteen year stint as a vegetarian junketarian and in taste-testing a variety of new foods, I decided to try sushi. The first piece was questionable, but I tried a second one. That time, I did the whole motion where you like, lurch forward and grab your mouth because some sort of violent energy is trying to escape. I'm proud to say that I did not puke.

But I will never eat sushi, ever, again.

To make up for my sushi-less diet I read Gorilla Sushi. You can, too. Stop by and check out today's caption contest, featuring one of MySelf Portraits!

11 Responses on "Jeannette does not eat sushi"

  1. rebecca says:

    ok, seriously, how did you have time to post this today of all days?

    @rebecca James is that awesome, that he would let me type up a blog while he loaded up the vehicles with our Miscellaneous Debris.

    Kathy G says:

    Wow, I haven't thought about Pantera's Pizza for about 30 years. Thanks (I think)

    mom says:

    So, if I decide to drop in you'll be at your new place?

    Kathy says:

    I'm now 30 and have gone for 22 years without tossing my cookies, barfing, upchucking, hurling, liquid burping, or whatever you call it;

    My record is ten years. (And that's only because of an unfortunate encounter with melon and a salad bar that was a little less than sanitary.) You are indeed the maser of not hurling.

    I am (of course) a sushi enthusiast so that story saddens me :) Have fun playing with your dishwasher!

    @gorilla sushi My sushi aversion is not by choice, it's by design. Nothing personal.

    Claire says:

    Loved your self portrait pic on GorillaSushi. I am sure I have read that book, but I was not naked or wearing a bucket on my head, hehe.

    The last time I puked was after a beer festival, who knew 17 different types of beer, 5 different ciders and some elderflower wine would make me puke like there was no tomorrow.

    Dwight says:

    Not sure how long you've been unvegetarian.

    I went veg for a year.

    You lose the enzymes in your stomach to break down red meat proteins. You don't think about that when you quit.

    You think about it a lot when you start back and get sick as a dog the first time you eat a steak.

    Maybe you don't have your enzymes back yet.

    Kim says:

    I love sushi. I love that picture. Happy move!

    I'm trying to remember what was the record for not puking on Seinfeld. Jerry had gone many years, too.